Google Search “Women’s Halloween Costumes”. The photo above is what you’re greeted with…. 

What is the deal these days? Everything for my age group is short, slutty, and cheap satin? Gross.

Now, we’ve talked about this before, my ass is large. All these “costume” options? Yeah, hello ass. Nice to see you. I wish this cheap fabric that cost me 50 bucks actually covered you. Is it breezy in here?!

Buzzfeed actually did a very interesting article on the costume nature. (as well as an article about all the clothes women have been told not to wear in 2014)…

Luckily, I grew up with a SUPER talented mother who is pretty much a fairy godmother/wizard with a sewing machine. She made all of my Halloween costumes, even the ones I made up… Princess Blue Star anyone? Which I then realized actually WAS a real character, she’s whats-his-names’s daughter from the Chronicles of Narnia, Voyage of the Dawn Treader. . yeah.

(ps, rocking the side swept bangs circa 1992, so fashion forward)

I had many wonderful costumes when I was little, but when I got to college I realized I had no sewing ability and would have to shell out the 50 bucks for a “costume”. Cue Batgirl.

I actually loved it, and I still have it today (I’ve repeated that costume a few times, so shoot me). However, our first party stop on campus some creep literally slid his hand down the back of me & grabbed my ass to say hello. NOT ok. Why do some men think this is acceptable!? I did NOT give you permission to touch me at all. How is it that a costume elicits such behavior? Many will say “well, you were asking for it in that outfit”. Was I? Pretty sure I wasn’t. Was it subconscious? I was completely covered, I even wore shorts underneath.

It made me angry; I didn’t even see his face. And I was too slow to react as he maneuvered away into the throng of people piling into the tiny townhouse.

Side Note: Also that year, the freshman on the softball team decided to do a group costume… what up Harlem Globe Trotters!

I figured out by the end of my 4 years that if I thought of a costume early enough, mom would still make it, so, for my senior year my boyfriend at the time decided he wanted us to be Aladdin and Jasmine.

Pretty sweet right.

Well, I got lazy again last year and did a last minute costume for an adult party I attended. Adult party. That’s weird to say. Luckily, I was able to find a red puffer vest and put together an awesome Marty McFly costume.

Since I usually have some fundamental issue with repeating a costume, on the actual evening of handing out candy, I threw on a pair of leopard ears and a party hat… Party Animal.

COME ON. That’s Punny. #SorryImNotSorry

I have no idea what I’m going to attempt to dress up as this year. Heck, I don’t even know what I’m carving into my pumpkin! My last 2 pumpkins have been pretty bomb. No joke.

Here’s the thing though. Regardless of what costume you decide on. No one has the right to make moves on you unless you verbally give them approval. No, you do not get to be branded as “asking for it” because of the clothing you wear. That’s harassment. It’s just like any other day or night out. Keep your hands to your damn self. Or did someone miss that lesson in first grade?